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Parents responsible for kids’ moral upbringing

Published/Last Modified on Friday, Apr 18, 2008 - 05:18:47 am MST

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To the Editor:

This is in reference to the decision of the Bisbee school board to provide condoms to the students attending the prom.

Decisions like this make it easier to understand why so many people are choosing to home school. It appears the inmates have taken over the asylum in some schools. I know the excuse will be that “they’re gonna do it anyway and if it prevents just one unwanted pregnancy or just one case of STD then it’s worth it,” but by condoning and encouraging premarital sex in teenagers the school board has abdicated its position as a responsible authority. What next? I hate to ask, knowing the same arguments used for passing out condoms could be used for providing clean weed or a safe place to drink booze.

Much as these school boards seem to want to relieve them of their duties, the moral upbringing of children is still the responsibility of the parents. Those parents who are trying to do their job right don’t need to be undermined by a group of elected old fogies who would rather appear to be “cool” in the eyes of the students than try to reinforce the self discipline that the parents of many of these students advocate.

Thank you Millicent Kasun for being the responsible adult in this case. Too bad for the whole community and especially the students that you were overruled. And thank you Chuck and Sharon Tuell for speaking out so eloquently on this matter. It was given such little attention in the original article that I missed it on the first read as I’m sure many others might have done, too.

Rowe Wilcox

Bisbee

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Joe W. wrote on Apr 30, 2008 6:15 PM:

" The inmates are taking over the asylum. However, in this and other cases like it I don't think it is intentional. They are getting lucky (no pun intended) by virtue of some adult athourity's permissive nature. A nature that in the case of schools is driven by the almighty dollar. It is a culture that creates these crises by authoritarians giving in in order to not offend any one and maintain current enrollment numbers that will bring in x amount of dollars. Gee. Only a hundred words, huh? Maybe we should bring back corporal punishment. Swat the buggers! Thanks. "

To Jamie wrote on Apr 28, 2008 9:54 PM:

" I'm not sure how you come to your conclusions, but I have never been miserable in life; quite the opposite. Don't become defensive. Condoms are not illegal to buy. They don't need to waste tax dollars handing them out. The students can buy their own. If a parent condones their kids of having teenage sex then those parents are certainly capable of handing condoms to their own kids or at least explain the importance of purchasing them and using them. They don't need the school board doing that for them. Neither do those parents that don't condone teenage sex. "

Jamie wrote on Apr 28, 2008 9:11 AM:

" It sounds as if someones way to cynical, and has gone through life miserable to never see whats good in life. I for one can't sit around and whine about welfare warriors, and illigals, yes they are a problem, but I work, raise my family, and do a dang good job of it. contributing to the cycle of waste? Seriously, it seems like your the one, since apparently your not happy in your life. Now thats the true waste. Sorry you can't see the good in life and the small things, like condoms to protect against diseases/unwanted pregnancy's! "

To Jamie wrote on Apr 27, 2008 11:20 PM:

" To Jamie, that is where we differ. I'm not a big fan of government handouts. I'm tired of the perpetual cycle of welfare dependent Americans who chose to stay on welfare because it is more convenient then working for a living. I'm tired of Illegal aliens taking advantage of the government handouts to get health care and food stamps and not contribute to our tax base. When the government gets involved in handout programs it always fails or backfires because it is never handled properly. Thanks for contributing to the cycle of waste. "

Jamie wrote on Apr 27, 2008 5:24 PM:

" I did give him money to buy condoms, and yes he even used them. And I'm glad he was responsible enough to do the right thing, when having sex. And if the board wants to save me ten bucks, hey go for it. More money for the gas tank. "

Free Thinker wrote on Apr 27, 2008 9:32 AM:

" This is such a joke.
Handing out condoms doesn't insure they will be used.
Stop running away from your responsibility of being a parent. If you really want the state to raise your children you better understand the state will now own your children & you will have no say on how the state will educate your children.

"

To Jamie wrote on Apr 26, 2008 2:22 PM:

" Then by all means, distribute condoms to your children. That's great. Even provide money so they can buy condoms at the gas station while they are filling up their tanks for the Prom. Do we really need a school board to do that for the parents? "

Jamie wrote on Apr 26, 2008 10:49 AM:

" I could care less that condoms were handed out. I feel better to have them and not need them, than to need them and not have them. I pounded into my kids safe sex. And they so far have lived by those rules. I did not promote going out and being a floosy by any means, but I told them that if they choose to have sex, then better to be safe than sorry. I also educated them on all the consequences of sex, especially at an young age. I spoke plain english to my kids, and they listened! "

Thats right wrote on Apr 25, 2008 4:24 PM:

" That's right! It's perfectly fine for our own kids to have sex at such a young age. It's not OK for the Polygamist cult kids to have sex at a young age. Let's hope the Cults passed out condoms too. "

Billy Hill wrote on Apr 25, 2008 6:07 AM:

" So who will be marking the kids on proper use of the condoms?
What happens if they fail?
If we send kids under 18 out to have sex, how are we better than the "polygamist Cult" in Texas? "

DanThePizzaMan wrote on Apr 25, 2008 12:50 AM:

" I don't know, but this might just be me, if someone handed me a crack pipe, or a needle and some heroin, would I do it? I don't think so, it is parent's responsibilities to raise their children and if they choose to be abstinent then they don't HAVE to take the condom, simple as that. just because and comparing condoms to drugs and alcohol is absurd, last time I checked condoms are a good thing, drugs and excessive alcohol abuse aren't. "

Huh wrote on Apr 24, 2008 9:24 AM:

" I addressed all of your other points in my last sentence. They are all out of context. Putting ... to connect different thoughts or sentences don't make your case. It is a tactic that people use to take someone's statement out of context, by leaving out key words or phrases. "

sierravistan wrote on Apr 24, 2008 6:51 AM:

" huh, as was I till you got into it , yes, he admitted dysfuntion, meaning he needed hel, not that he was additced..get the difference, noticed neither of you said anything about the other insults, and that is YOU taking things out of context....to be accused of being "responsible for social disintegration... told your kids have a sex addiction..hmmm "

Huh wrote on Apr 23, 2008 4:46 PM:

" I'm sure if "Dysfunctional" felt offended by the exchange he would have said so by now. He sounded like he was fully capable of arguing his case. I was rather enjoying the exchange until now. "

Huh wrote on Apr 23, 2008 4:42 PM:

" sierravistan, you are taking things out of context and are still seeing something that isn't there. "Dysfunctional" admitted having a sexual dysfunction in the previous comment. He stated, "still having sex even though I am dysfunctional, thanks to Viagra." Observer was responding to that comment. Your next reference "I believe sex is a private matter intended for primarily one thing: procreation--not a tool for self-indulgent Bacchanalian orgies." This is an opinion not an insult. He was also referring to the person's philosphy not to the person. You left that out didn't you. All of your points are out of context. "

sierravistan wrote on Apr 23, 2008 1:10 PM:

" "rowe and Huh"

Observer submitted on 4-18 & 4-19...
your secual dsyfuntions
self-indulgent Bacchanalain orgies
developed a longterm,serious addition
clailm your share of America's social disintigration
your additions. And your kids.

hardly compliments, definitely insults. "

Huh wrote on Apr 22, 2008 6:46 PM:

" I did a search on the site and the only mention of "sex addict" was your's sierravistan. I suppose my mention will be the second. Where was it stated that someone was accused of being "responsible for the social disintegration" of America? I think you are stretching things a bit and seeing things that aren't there. There have been nothing but civil expressions of opinions. Not sure why you are so upset. You protest too much over a civil discourse. "

rowe wilcox wrote on Apr 22, 2008 6:35 AM:

" In reference to sierravistan comment, I'm still waiting for you to show me where I am guilty of calling other posters names. I believe Passerby pegged your comments to a tee with the word "incoherent". Most of your comments are just that. No wonder you use a pseudonym. "

Observer wrote on Apr 21, 2008 5:49 PM:

" Initially, I thought you might be a responsible, thoughtful poster. However, having reviewed your histrionics on 'Sierra Vista is a nice place to live' and on this thread, I've concluded you're light years behind most of those who contribute to this forum. You presume yourself to be the reasonable 'mediator' between those who have specific views that go to the heart of issues, but in fact you're overwhelmed and unable to understand the subtleties in these 100-word exchanges. So please refer to your Bible for solace and remain outside intelligent exchanges. Let the big boys handle it. "

sierravistan wrote on Apr 21, 2008 4:04 PM:

" what, calling someone a "sex addict is not calling them names, then waht is that a great compliment? telling someone that they would "not know about addictions being unhealty" what, another compliment? accusing someone of being "responsible" for the "social disintegration" of America...another compliment...why can't you just express your opinion, let others do same and remain a respectful adult who allows other opinions to exist, yes, disagree, but do not insult...and yes, there have been (key word there) the same in the past, but have decided to "discuss" rather than insult, can you?. "

rowe wilcox wrote on Apr 21, 2008 5:56 AM:

" sierra vistan: I didn't call anyone any names other than referring to the members of the school board as "old fogies", which they are in comparison to the students. I haven't been in church in years other than for weddings and funerals and couldn't quote more than 2 or 3 verses from the bible. This isn't about religion, it's about parents being responsible for the moral upbringing of their children and not letting the school board determine what is right and wrong for them on moral issues. "

Huh? wrote on Apr 20, 2008 7:24 PM:

" "sierravistan", what are you talking about? Who is calling who names? It looks like a pretty civil discussion to me at this point. Huh? "

Passerby wrote on Apr 20, 2008 12:53 PM:

" Having recalled your rather emotional vile name-calling on this forum (in re: Sierra Vista) to the point that you became almost incoherent, I think your attempt to pretend to be a reasonable moderator between Dysfunctional and Observer is vastly disingenuous. You may make sense in dull circles, but your uninteresting, non-contributing commentary on this item are not welcome. Go read your bible alone and shut up, lest you draw unwanted, pointed comments about your attempt to inject Christian moral guidance into this forum's discussions. "

sierravistan wrote on Apr 20, 2008 9:39 AM:

" to Rowe and Observer....hey, calm down already, this is an open forum for discussion, what are you dong calling people names and judging them for expressing their opinion? as you are obviously both bible readers, did you read the one about..." judge not lest ye be judged? then why are you judging people simply for putting forth their opnion, what everyone is entitled to their opniona...as long as it is yours? this furm rapidly becomes a place to name call and dismiss others because you don't happen to agree, don't like it, don't read it. "

Dysfunctional wrote on Apr 19, 2008 7:41 PM:

" To Observer, Yes I think in you purtian mind, my kids are probably addicted to a healthy sex life. Good for them. "

Rowe Wilcox wrote on Apr 19, 2008 10:24 AM:

" Since so few people seemed to mind the Bisbee school board passing out condoms in the prom gift bags, then there should be little objection if they decide to include bibles next year. It's just for a little balance, you know, and just as no one is forcing the students to use the condoms, no one will be forcing them to read the bibles, either. As Neil said, the issue isn't just the condoms, it is the usurping of parental authority with little or no input from the parents. "

Observer wrote on Apr 19, 2008 10:15 AM:

" Hey, Dysfunctional, I fully understand why you find it novel that the primary function of sex is procreation--you've been dedicated so long to a self-indulgent Bacchanalian philosophy that you've developed a long-term, serious addiction. Addictions of any kind, as you probably would NOT know, are unhealthy, but who cares? You're an unabashed modern American who can proudly claim your share of America's social disintegration, including a runaway rate of teen pregnancies, rampant STDs including AIDS, a school system in utter disarray, crime and drug addiction that leads the world. Yes, all that follows from your addictions. And your kids? "

Dysfunctional wrote on Apr 19, 2008 7:05 AM:

" Observer: That is news to me and probably at lot of other people, that sex is just for procreation. I think sex twice a week is practically a necessity. If I followed your way of thinking I would have only had it three times in my life. I feel for your spose, if you have one. If you don;t, I can understand why. "

Huh? wrote on Apr 19, 2008 4:51 AM:

" Don't they teach safe sex in health class? Why do we need the school board to issue condoms to the kids? Handing out condoms isn't an effective way to stop unwanted teen pregnancies or STDs. Putting a sign up at the entrance of the Prom telling teens wear condoms would be more effective then handing out condoms. Who's going to be there to ensure they use the condoms? Giving a condom to a kid and expecting him to use it is as effective as telling him to put the toilet seat down. If you don't remind him it won't happen. "

Observer wrote on Apr 18, 2008 3:37 PM:

" TO: Dysfunctional. I hope you don't think that because you survived your early sexual experience, it somehow proves anything. But since you're not shy about baring your indiscretions, let me ask you this: Did you teach your three kids that it's OK to be promiscuous? As to your present sexual dysfunction, the difference between us is this: if I had to resort to such artifices, I'd be embarrassed to let it all hang out. But that's the essence of our differences: I believe sex is a private matter intended for primarily one thing: procreation--not a tool for self-indulgent Bacchanalian orgies. "

Neil wrote on Apr 18, 2008 2:19 PM:

" Mr Wilcox,

Great Letter. The issue is not about teenage sex or STDs, but the board acting like a responsible authority and not undermining the efforts of parents.
Excellent! "

Life Long SV Resident wrote on Apr 18, 2008 12:14 PM:

" This is a lesson that needs to be taught to EVERYONE who does not have a decent enough income to support children. If you can't support kids with adequate financial and emotional support, you don't deserve to have them. Bringing kids into this world in poverty is selfish and cruel.

It is also the parents responsibility to teach their children English, not my tax dollars. "

Dysfunctional wrote on Apr 18, 2008 11:31 AM:

" Yes Observer, I had sex when I was a teenager, raised three children, owned a successful business, and am now retired, still having sex even though I am dysfunctional, thanks to Viagra. "

Lee wrote on Apr 18, 2008 9:28 AM:

" I definately agree that parents are responsible for their kids' moral upbringing. The problem is, often that doesn't happen. Too many parents are too self-absorbed to give their kids what they need. Then, unfortunately, it falls to the schools and/or the judicial system to intervene. "

Observer wrote on Apr 18, 2008 8:19 AM:

" Rowe, your letter is a wonderful moral reminder to those who have been led to believe that sexual intimacy is 'normal' for youngsters. However, I fear you (and I) are in the distinct minority. I've fought this issue for years, but have virtually given up now--as you say, the inmates have taken over the asylum and have convinced the world that their twisted logic is not only acceptable, but ethical. I weep not for the stupidity of the school board, but for the kids who will suffer some form of dysfunctionalism for the rest of their lives. "

What a reach wrote on Apr 18, 2008 7:36 AM:

" So the handing out condoms to the children of parents that take responsibility, and teach their children moral values, is going to make those goody two shoe children, start having sex immediately just because they have a condom? "

What? wrote on Apr 18, 2008 7:01 AM:

" First, some parents will not be responsible for their children, therefore society must step in. Unless you *like* all your tax dollars going towards raising more unwanted children? Second, handing out condoms does not condone their use. Not any more than the availability of junk food condones excessive consumption or the ability of vehicles to go over 100 condone driving that fast. Using condoms is *responsible* behavior, and that is what is condoned. Why is it okay to teach kids not to play with fire, talk to strangers, etc etc but the minute we educate about sex, it's condoning? "